Over the years, the meaning of love has diversified greatly. With the advancements in technology, growth in societies and the cultural blend, there are thousands of things involved when it comes to falling in love.
As humans, we have an instinct to constantly change and adapt to our environment. Thus, we start letting go of the old ways to love, care and woo someone off their feet. Instead, we have started to approach the realistic way of living. So much so that I barely see people talk or believe in soul mates or loving one person all their lives. It is sometimes disappointing and mostly worrying, it really gets you thinking, whether today’s generation, you and I, are giving up on love?
Are we calling quits on the greatest phenomenon of our lives? What really changed and how have we changed with it? Maybe we just need to be reminded of the old simple ways so we can find our way back. So here are the things about why we give up and what should we actually do.
1. WE BELIEVE “SOULMATES” IS A FAR-FETCHED IDEA
I have no idea how this idea changed over this period of time but I believe you truly fall in love once, only with your soul mate. Now that doesn’t mean that you might not love someone you have been with, we all love people in different ways but we often mistake them for being someone we want to love all our lives. We have lost the patience of waiting for “The One”. We just want start off our lives and be with someone even before we understand the intricacies of a relationship and start calling it love because that’s what everyone does.
So you keep on calling every partner of yours your soulmate because ultimately that what you want, your true soul mate, but keep settling for something else.
I’d say, wait, wait for the right person. Don’t rush into a relationship just because they seem nice. Seems-nice and have-never-seen-anyone-like-it are two very different things. Do not confuse the two, when the latter one comes into your life, trust me, everyone else will feel like a joke to you.
. WE DATE FOR THE HECK OF IT
We do it because everyone is doing it! We no more want to love, we want to date. It’s the band wagon effect. We feel lonely because everyone else has a partner. We don’t want to spend New Years Eve alone so we find a partner. Dating is so casual nowadays that making room for love has become impossible. Very few people mature out of this at an early stage of life once they get tired of the constant hellos and goodbyes of such partners.
We settle down once we are tired of ‘dating’, till then too much time has passed and out of frustration and sheer impatience we actually make ourselves believe whoever we meet next are our soulmate. That’s not what you call love, that is what you call settling for something.
3. CONVERSATIONS LATER, SEX AND BOOZE BEFORE
Sadly, we jump into bed with absolutely anyone and hesitate from actually communicating with anyone. We start dating someone we like to sleep with which obviously ends badly. Our first meetings are mostly based on semi-alert minds with all the drinks flowing in our blood streams.
Our plans are mostly, meeting over a few drinks. Whatever happened to the walks in the park or having deep conversations over coffee? Honestly, love doesn’t happen in bed or in your prettiest ensemble. It happens in the crooked moments of vulnerability and the soothing pats of humbleness.
We, maybe due to falling for wrong people for too many times, have somehow found an escape that helps us be happy with our lives momentarily but what happens after all this temporary crap is over. Yeah, I’d call it crap because that is what its true value is when it comes to true love.
True love never comes easy and happens to different people in different stages of life. So don’t lose your faith on it. Everyone is meant to love someone, one day, and you will too. Till then, don’t make the mistake of filling your past with too many wrong people.